Why it’s better to learn to drive when you’re a bit older

Toot toot beep beep! I don’t admit this often, but I’m glad I can drive now. I passed my test in 2016 aged 32, so I was almost twice the age most people are when they first hit the road. And for me, that was absolutely the best decision.

Learning to drive is not always a young person’s game. In fact, I think for some people it’s a far better experience to wait until you’re at a later stage in life, and I’m going to tell you why that is below.

You can approach it with a more pragmatic attitude. Later in life you’ve probably accomplished a few things – perhaps a degree, a family, progressed in a career you enjoy, maybe even a Nobel prize. The point is, you know you’re capable of achieving good things when you set your mind to it, and this is not different. I started learning to drive right after I graduated (also as someone a bit older) and thought to myself “if I could do that, I can do this”

You fully understand the implications of driving. You’ll be just that bit more mindful that you’re in charge of a machine that has the potential to both help and hinder yourself and others. That should help to ensure that you remain vigilent and consciously competent throughout your driving life. To this day I remember stock phrases and nuggets of wisdom that my instructor gave to me.

You already know that a large majority of poeople on the roads have the potential to be dangerous dick heads. You may have been just a passenger until now but I bet you’ve seen it! I’d say the most important part of driving is to ensure you’re aware of other people’s mistakes and bad habits above your own.

The end result will make you feel just that bit more smug. You’ve probably been a public transport user your whole life (unless you’re lucky and have a very flexible partner/family member or paid chauffeur) that means working to someone else’s schedule, setting off even earlier and, delays and contending with waiting outdoors in all seasons. When you have your own method of transport and rely on yourself after so long, it means that little bit more. You don’t have to share your space, you can stay warm and dry, you drive to the exact place you’re going instead of the closest stop…

It opens even more doors and makes you feel even more valuable. When I got a call to say my grandparents were ill, I could immediately jump in the car and help them. I could do the pick ups/drop offs at hospital and take them food shopping every week. I have been able to go off to work meetings and events around the UK by myself, proving I am capable of doing things to my own initiative. Hell, I’ve even been trusted to drive a transit van with delicate perishables in the back! Rather than worrying about how ill be able to do all of that driving, I’ve worried about how I wouldn’t have been able to help or become an asset in those circumstances.

If you’ve been on the fence about driving, this post may give you a little push to give it a go and see what you think. Of you’ve never thought about as someone older than a teenage, I would wholeheartedly encourage you to consider it. Like me, it could be the best thing you never wanted to happen!

Thanks for reading, J xx


Thank you, next…A final review of my 5 things for 2019 (and a few other things I’m so f*****g grateful for)

This is basically going to be a summary of how I’ve done with the goals I set myself at the start of the year with an added ‘happy list’ at the end. 2019 has been a bit of a weird year, but I only want to mark the things I’ve enjoyed about it, so even though I’ve had my share of rocky patches this year you won’t find them in this post!

1 – Shop in my own closet 75% of the time

I’ve done really well on this, a lot better than I even expected especially more so than the year before when I just banned spending completely.

I’ve probably invested in a couple more frivolous purchases over the last few weeks (hello Black Friday sales) but even then these were things I’d wanted for a while. I’m still thinking more deeply about buying before I pull the trigger and being more responsible with my money, which has enabled me to get more stuff done at home which makes me joyous, so I’m confident this have evolved into a behaviour I can maintain.

2 – Get a home bar

It’s done, goal achieved, I just can’t show you because that area 0f the house doesn’t photograph well (and also, the area itself needs to be restyled to accommodate) here’s a peek of what it looked like when we first set it up at the very end of last year, but it looks different now

Expect some better pictures and styling for this one in 2020!

3 – Un-join the gym and get outside

Well, this pledge has made it all the way to the end of the year! The girls and I still head out most Sundays (not every week, as sometimes people have plans or have had a heavy night before) and have plans to carry this on into 2020. It’s been a fantastic opportunity to not only get a bit of light regular exercise, but brilliant to see my girls much more often than I have for a long time which is great for my sense of health.

I did start to incorporate a bit of extra home cardio into this as I said I wanted to in my last update, however I sustained a bit of an injury and then didn’t manage to get back to it, but I will. I’m still quite clear that I don’t want to head back to join a gym at this point.

4 – Get out of the house more

Overall, I’d argue that I have done this throughout the year, however the Mr would probably disagree wholeheartedly!

I’ve said yes more than no to activities outside of work this year, though there have been a couple of periods where I was just knackered and needed to have a bit of time being a hermit indoors. But hey, I’m human and I’ll never be perfect.

5 – Dranks out, drinks in

You may remember that I took this one out of the running completely about halfway through the year. I’d had a few days/evenings on the sauce and felt it wasn’t going to be realistic to cut out as much as I’d expected. I’m not in any way disappointed about having to do this, I happen to think it’s healthy constantly review and change goals if they’re no longer relevant or achievable for whatever reason. More to the point, this one was vetoed for good reasons – I’ve had some lovely times out and about enjoying a couple of cocktails and some laughs with the Mr and my girls.

Other good things that 2019 has brought for me

– Getting to know and meet some wonderful people

This has been such an important part of why there have been positive points of 2019. There are people are already knew a little bit that I’ve spent more time with and lived, and I’ve met new people in a variety of ways that have become some of nicest/wisest/bestest influences on my state of mind. Thank you to all of you, I will Co ti ue to annoy you further in the new year!

– Travelling to Italy

A very important part of my bucket list was completed, and so much more as part of this trip. I most definitely heart Italy and would really like to see what else it has to offer.

– Feeling relaxed and comfortable in my own home

This probably sounds a bit weird, but I spent over 7 years in my last house just never quite feeling right and enjoying living there. It took a looooong time to find our current house (almost 11 months overall, and 8 months after selling the aforementioned one) but for me it was worth it. Although the Mr occasionally complains its smaller (and it is, a bit) it has a much better vibe about it and we’ve actually made some positive strides into to decorating and making it out own. I’m beyond excited to keep cracking on with this next year.

– The discovery of Ru Paul’s drag race

You could either think this is weird, or you could think ‘what the hell took you so long?’ to this! After hearing pretty much the whole of my social media feeds say how brilliant it was, I binge watched the entire first season one night when I was home alone and having a bit of a testing time. I really enjoyed it, and within 3 months I’d watch seasons 1-10 and the UK season 1 (I was team DDC and Cheryl Hole if anyone is interested).

Having a show so far removed from my reality was exactly the escapism I needed at a pretty stressful time, which I’m hugely grateful for. I just need to work out how I can watch the All Stars seasons that aren’t on Netflix now…little help??

– Experiencing my first Pride in Hull

I was invited to be part of this very important event in July, when I was on season 4 of Drag Race and I got to watch Alaska Thuderfuck perform which was blooming brilliant (but then had very high expectations of her appearance on season 5 which I watched shortly after).

What I lived about this event the most was the comraderie of the city, and the empassioned speech given by the Lord Mayor who is himself part of the LGBTQ community. I’m very proudly an ally for anybody who needs this.

– Spent more time with my niece and nephew

These munchkins are 4 and 5 and are genuinely two of my favourite people in the whole world. They’re so funny. clever and kind.

This year I’ve been on holiday with them, had them both over for sleepovers and generally just had them more at the house for visits and being the cool aunt I was born to be.

– I was immortalised in cartoon form

Bit weird (are you sensing a theme here) but on three occasions this year the ghost artist known as Peter and Paul made me and my HEY Bloggers gals part of thisbseries featuring local celebrities or prominent figures. For this reason I’m very flattered indeed, however I have been a bit dubious about the tattoos and cave woman-style outfits I’ve worn to date!

Thanks joining me this year, this decade (or even just for this post) on my blog. As always, I plan to keep going and add more and different content – as long as I enjoy it and put the work in, I hope you will too.

Thanks for reading, and wishing you very best for theyear ahead

J xx