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“Being a blogger isn’t a real job” Wrong – it is, AND it makes you more employable
This phrase really boils my p**s. Partly because it’s uttered by people who have very little knowledge of what blogging means and what’s involved with doing it, but mainly because it’s a statement that isn’t true.
I don’t work for myself currently or as a full time blogger, but I know people who are, so yes it in fact it is a real job that is reconfised by the marketing industry as part of a fully integrated strategy for communications. However, I want to talk more about the skills and experience blogging can provide you with to help you improve your professional experience overall.
Being a blogger has allowed me to get a foot in the door at interviews and move into a career that’s more me (I went from being a Mortgage Advisor to working in Marketing). Obviously, my degree is also a huge player in that, but feedback from interviewers (and the job offers that followed) told me it gave me an edge over other candidates. I also have many other friends that have shared experience of this, so it’s definitely a thing!
So here, I’m flinging the door wide open and showing you how this fantastic hobby (or side hustle, as I like to call it) can really benefit you in the real world.
Copywriting. I’ve always LOVED writing (and love is not a word I use freely) so it’s no surprise that my hobby includes putting pen to paper (well, fingers to iPad). Developing your use of the written word, forming your own ‘style’ and being able to adapt that is a huge asset for any job you have, not just marketing or full time blogging. Sending e-mails, writing instructions, completing briefs, they all require good written communication.
Professional networking. Blogger events aren’t just a lovely fun day out where you can pick up useful tips to boot, they’re also a chance to meet and mingle with new people. This is basically LinkedIn live, and realistically, how many of your contacts do you have the chance to meet IRL? This is the perfect chance to gain confidence in speaking to new people as well as making meaningful connections that could help you on your future blogging path.
Organisation. If you have any hobby you’re passionate about, you plan your time outside of work around doing it. If want to keep your posts regular, your social media content flowing and engagement with the community (online and in person) you need to get yourself into an organised frame of mind!
Pitching. By this I mean liaising with companies to secure joint activity – whether this be paid ads, gifting opportunities, press trips or event attendance. I’m going to say this loud and clear so y’all can hear me in the back “JUST BECAUSE YOU ARE A BLOGGER YOU ARE NOT AUTOMATICALLY ENTITLED TO BE GIVEN FREE STUFF AND BE INVITED TO AMAZING PARTIES EYC ETC”. This is the biggest misconception
Working on your own or as part of a team. I’ve always said that blogging can be quite a solo pursuit at times, it’s basically you writing what you think and feel about stuff on the Internet. However it allows you opportunities to work with other Bloggers or companies on campaigns, articles or even trips, which involves a bit more of a team working and collaborative approach. In my blogging journey, I’ve taken this a step further and thrown myself to the forefront by helping to create and launch a blogging community, HEY Bloggers. There are four of us working on this and are accountable for different aspects of what this entails, which involves a huge amount of regular and clear communication and comraderie to ensure our team remains effective for the benefit of the community.
Prioritising workload. Just like at any other job, there are deadlines. They may be set by a company you’re working with to produce content by X date, or they may just be deadlines you’ve set for yourself e.g. certain dates of the week you want to upload new posts. The best way to meet deadlines? Look at all the jobs you have and prioritise them in order of importance. This is a life skill, not just a work skill. Not only that, but if you can also learn to adapt and re-prioritise your workload at short notice, you will become catnip to prospective employers.
If you’re a blogger, I hope this has reminded you of the great qualities you’ve developed as a result. If you’re not a blogger, I hope that having a bit more insight into our world gives a better understanding of why this profession/hobby/side hustle adds so much value to the world of work.
Thanks for reading,
J xx
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It’s OK to want to change things about yourself without feeling like you’re hating on the world at large
As I was growing up I lived as part of a society that taught me only one body was desirable to the opposite sex – Petite, slim, big boobs and long hair. In my teens people like Jennifer Lopez and Beyonce came into the world of celebrity, and with their big booties and curvy hips they managed to gently prod a generation into seeing a different kind of attractive.
Fast forward to the present day, and the world has evolved again. Now we’re told that all body types are beautiful and should be embraced/celebrated, and that we should love our own body for what it is rather than what it could be.
But is it as simple as that?
No, it’s not. I’d like to go on record saying that I wholeheartedly support a society that acknowledges humans come in a wide variety of forms and to ensure that all are catered for as fairly as possible. I have a great admiration for people in the public eye and that I know in real life who project a confidence and sex appeal that I could only ever dream of. I fiercely stand by the opinion that fad diets/products DO NOT WORK (it still both bemuses and concerns me that a post I did about trying Boombod 2 years ago is still one of my most read every single month) however I do believe in eating plans that encourage moderation and good habits such as Slimming World.
So with all of these beliefs firmly planted in my mind, would it surprise you to learn that there are things I can’t accept and would like to change about myself? Because there are, and I do.
Thanks in part to J-Lo and Queen Bey, I feel confident in accepting that my body shape isn’t straight up and down, its somewhere closer to a pear (curvy hips and bigger thigh/bum area) but what I’ve never been able to fully accept is the size of my body, and this is the aspect I want to address.
There are many reasons why I dislike my body size. Primarily, it’s because it represents unhappiness. My body is the result of emotional eating caused by a period of difficult situations, and through lethargy caused by my fragile state of mind as a result. If I knew that inside I was healthy and happy, and that my weight gain was a sign of enjoying life, then I hav3le no doubt that I would feel differently about the reflection staring back at me. If each extra pound represented a romantic meal or nights on the town drinking cocktails with the girls, there’d be a valid and enjoyable reason. Don’t get me wrong; I have done those things, but far more rarely.
And this is why I think it’s OK for me to say that there are things I don’t like about my body shape or size whilst still being absolutely accepting of those that look different to me, similar to me or don’t want to look how I’d like to look. I’m not throwing shade at any of those people, I’m simply saying that’s not the right thing for me. I’m saying that I acknowledge I’m not completely happy or healthy and that I’d like to take action to change this. I’m saying that I’ve been through hell and my exterior reminds me of this every bloody day, which makes me feel worse. I’m saying that it will take more than a change in mindset to be able to accept what I look like. Finally, I’m saying that I am a different person to you – I’m built to think, feel and react differently, so my actions are going to be different to other people’s.
If people don’t like my opinions, that’s fine. As I said, everybody is different and has their own truth. However, they are valid and are mine. To say otherwise wouldn’t be very accepting of ME, would it?
Thanks for reading,
J xx
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Let’s chat – January 2020
I’m very lucky that I know a lot of people who serve as an inspiration to me in all aspects of life, probably more so than they realise.
Recently, I’ve become inspired to basically picked up the baton that my pal Call me Amy put down at the back end of 2019 on a slightly different style of monthly roundup post, so that’s what I’m kicking off today.
I think she’s come up with a really good format that I’ve enjoyed reading from her, and personally I think it will be good me to reflect the good bits of each month and actually plan stuff in. Less time spending every waking moment away from work glued to the couch for me this year! So, here we go, enjoy…
– Cardi B, Invasion of Privacy
– Ministry of Sound Throwback Hip Hop
– Eminem, Best of
– 24: Typical me, I only get into a show after it’s finished! Currently on the penultimate series watching Jack Bauer have incredibly action packed days without having any sleep whilst being in his late 40s. True goals.
– Roast Battle (Comedy Central): Funny and savage in one handy half hour segment!
– Friends (Comedy Centre/Channel 5): Could I BE any more hipster throwback?
– Celebrated the Mr’s birthday: He got presents, we had nice dinner and cake, and for the next six months I can pretend he’s only a year younger than me
– Went to a roller disco: Talked into by friends, too scared to do it properly, only accident I managed to have was getting out the car on the way home. Not for me!
– Went on the radio: I popped into BBC Radio Humberside to appear with my HEY Blogger gals on No Filter which was hosted by our Violet! Click the no filter link to listen to our ep.
– Saw Ed Byrne live: This guy was the first comedian who ever made me laugh out loud, yet this is only the second time I’ve ever seen him live and the first time in Hull
– Partied with drag queens: I was kindly invited to the Pride in Hull Queer AF event (which was the same night as Ed, check me out doing double bubble!) where I got to meet the Drag Race UK finalist Baga Chipz!
Thanks for reading,
J xx
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Some people just aren’t nice – coping with toxic influences
Some people just aren’t nice – coping with toxic influences If you’ve seen the title, you know the story. And honestly, it’s one I’m sorry that’s made it’s way over to my page, but I think we have to talk about it.
By toxic, I don’t mean people like murderes/rapists/terrorists, there’s a special place in hell reserved for them and for which toxic is too polite a word. By toxic, I mean people that have made their way into your life somehow but are rude/nasty/inconsiderate/controlling for reasons which seem bafflingly unclear to a relatively normal or sane person.
Toxic people are bullies whose behaviour is damaging and unacceptable. Their behaviour is not your fault, it’s their fault. Nobody should have to endure people like this. Buuuuuutttt….you can’t cut ’em all out of your life, sorry.
Because they’re everywhere, toxic people are unavoidable. I have always had what I believed to be a fairly reasonable set of standards for people and friendship, sadly over the years I’ve come understand that my standards are in fact pretty high (not a bad thing) and my expectations had to lower. Sure you can minimise contact to an extent with toxic influences, but if they’re someone you deal with on your commute, in the workplace or a place you visit often, that makes things a wee bit more challenging. Much better I think, is to empower yourself by having the tools to deal with them.
Forewarned is forearmed. You’re likely to know who are the toxic people around you, so be aware of this and you have the chance to steel yourself for your next delightful encounter with them.
Take your time. You know the way person acts pushes your buttons which can make for a knee-jerk irrational response from you. Not only will that upset you, but you may come off as a bit of a dick in the process. Give yourself a little bit of time to think about what was said/done, calm down. It’s perfectly acceptable to politely excuse yourself from a room to prevent this and get some space if you need to.
Think. Does this person’s words/actions need a response? A lot of the time, it probably doesn’t. There’s no point telling them they’ve upset you because they won’t care or (worse still) that’s exactly what they want you to feel. Being dignified or silent makes far more noise.
Remember (this is the most important one). The words of toxic people do not mean shit. No, really. You don’t have to take criticism from somebody that you wouldn’t take advice from. Their words may be their (albeit warped) trust, but they’re not yours. Don’t accept them.
Someone always has your back. You have people in your life that are brilliant to be around. People that you would go to for advice, people who actively build you up with their words, people who you greet with a feeling of happiness rather than dread. Spend more time with or communicating with them, and remind yourself that this is what the majority of the world looks like.
If you have toxic influences you deal with on the daily, I’m sorry that you have to put up with that. They are the ones who are flawed and need to get better, so try not to be too bitter about their presence.
Thanks for reading,
J xx
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Talk FOMO to me
This isn’t something you only experience as a kid, or a teen, or even as a young adult. Nope. FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out) can affect you at any age or stage in life.
I don’t think people fully appreciate how difficult this feeling is for somebody but, in extreme cases, FOMO has the capacity to be as harmful as any mental health condition. Not only can it breed feelings of anxiety or worthlessness, but it can also help them to grow if they’re already there.
I’ve often beaten myself up when experiencing FOMO and let the feeling really eat away at my insides – why didn’t they invite me? Do they hate me? What I do to make them hate me? And spend the rest of the day/night overanlysing every little thing I’ve done and said recently that may have warranted my exclusion from a social event. And in the digital age we live in, you find out pretty easily when people are somewhere you’re not.
So what do you do? Sit, wallow and hope you can work out how to be the delightful/funny/sassy person you need to get yourself an invite next time whilst tryna act all “I’m FINE” in public. People saw through that act in The One Where Ross Is Fine, and you’re not fine.
So, what should you do? Over the years I’ve learnt that if you have the tools to cope this will go a long way, but you have to use them committedly and consistently:
1. Reframe and retrain your brain. Tell yourself over and over “I don’t know the context of why I haven’t been invited. So and so could have wanted a private chat about something, they might’ve just bumped into each other, etc etc…” You just don’t know, and you might never know, so you can’t presume it’s a bad thing.
2. Do something. Call a family member, ring another friend and make plans with them. If you’re doing something, you’re not thinking about what you may be missing out on.
3. Embrace the JOMO (that’s Joy Of Missing Out). Quite different from the above but another tactic to consider. Ok, so you’re not out being a social butterfly, so why not embrace the time and indulge in a little self care. Pamper session with pizza and Netflix, a lazy wander round the shops, book a massage, maybe just retreat to bed for a nap and some trash tv. Whatever takes you to your happy place, do that and allow yourself to appreciate that you have the time to yourself.
Don’t get me wrong; I’m not perfect and I do still have low moments where I cant help but let the FOMO in, but it happens less often and don’t last for very long. I don’t think I could ever fully embrace a JOMO state of mind, but having some strategies to deal with it (like any difficult situation) are a huge help. If you’re a FOMO sufferer too, I encourage you to try ’em out.
Thanks for reading,
J xx
About Me
I’m Jenny, nice to meet you. I’m a thirty-something who likes fashion, holidays and wondering about life. A lot.
